Jim Hates Cats

So, funny thing-- both my parents got remarried within two months of each other, 5 years ago. Dalila, my dad's wife is cool, and Jim, my mom's new husband is pretty chill too-- only... there's kind of a BIG problem that my mom seemed to have overlooked before she tied the knot for all of eternity... Jim hates animals. Well, cats to be specific. I find it odd that this wasn't a larger factor, or didn't create issues before they wed, but they got engaged after six months, so how well can you really know a person, RIGHT?!?! Just kidding. Kind of. Anyway, though he denies it (sometimes), Jim doesn't like animals.

Exhibit 1: When Jim was a child, he had a big, let's just say a big friendly lab puppy, since the breed of the dog seems to have slipped my mind at the moment. So, Jim's large friendly lab pup, liked to play and jump around, like any normal puppy would. Here's where shit gets weird... So, this one day, the lab puppy was really riled up, jumping and playing and he wouldn't settle down. How does Jim solve the problem? He punches the dog in the stomach.... the pup then proceeds to wobble around in a circle a few times, until it ultimately throws up on his kitchen floor. Somehow, when Jim tells it, he's laughing throughout the whole story, while my mother and I are objecting and gasping through the whole thing. Fortunately, Jim says about 30 seconds after the lab upchucked, he was back jumping around Jim and trying to play with him. So he says....

So, naturally, Jim doesn't like our favorite little furry felines. Yet, this hasn't stopped our family tradition of always having more than one cat at a time (thank god). Unfortunately though, the only other man in the house, Moo (our cat of seven years), decided one day, that he was going to move out. This is another tale for another time, but long story short-- Moo moved in two houses down our street into our foreign  neighbor's home... SICK MOO. REALLY COOL.

Moving on (no pun intended), this left our other cat, Bella, all alone. And because my sister and I have both left the nest, and my mother and Jim are at work all day long, Bella's been pretty lonely and depressed. This is where I offer a solution!

So, before I got my summer internship in Washington DC, my plan was to go home for the summer and bring Linky along with me to meet the fam, and get a feel for where he would eventually be living with me for the next three years, while I'm in law school. But because I won't be going home for the summer, and I don't feel leaving comfortable leaving Lincoln alone for three months with people he doesn't know, in a strange place he's never been before-- plans changed. We decided Lincoln would stay up here, with Nickolas and Danielle.

This actually worked out, because now I have a replacement cat to take home instead-- toothless/the black cat/senora fluffel bottom(/and now, according to my mother---Precious)! While everyone is just so excited to meet the new addition, Jim, on the other hand, is not.

Since he's heard the news that the black cat is moving in this summer, strange things have been happening. For instance, sometimes, I'll receive texts from Bella off of  Jim's cell phone, stating that she will be hostile towards the new cat, and that it can not come to stay permanently, or even for a short period.

Since then he's gotten a little more creative, sending me various pictures and emails:

Ah, what really takes the cake though, is this last email he sent me:

This is me circa 2009, when my best friend Asha and I went to Cancun after our high school graduation.......don't know how he found this picture....lololol....like sick joke. The captions really add such a nice touch...

Anyway, like I've told Jim, sorry, the decision has been made. Resistance is futile. Accept defeat. The cat is coming.