The Art of Speaking "Meow"

     "As a resident of Southern California, a widely diverse and multi-cultural area, I am proud to be bilingual. I consider it one of my most important personal qualities, on the basis that my second language partly defines who I am.

     Growing up in a predominantly Caucasian region, my first language was English. My second language, however, had nothing to do with race, location or how I was raised.

     It is a rare tongue that only a fortunate handful have been exposed to. When heard spoken aloud, it has not only attracted looks of confusion and bewilderment from ignorant bystanders unfamiliar with the dialect, but it's also caused laughter and ridicule to those brave souls who dare to speak it. One either accepts the idiom with a warm welcome and ultimately becomes a practicing follower, or rejects it with patronizing ridicule. 

     Despite the hardships and mockery I have consistently faced speaking my language of choice, I am proud to be fluent in "Meow."

     Meow is a contextual language my current boyfriend and I created our freshman year of high school. Beginning only as a simple pet name, a term of endearment such as "baby" or "sweetheart," it quickly expanded into something bigger than just some affectionate nickname. It stealthily slipped into our everyday conversations, replacing other common words. 

     Though it may sound perplexing at first, speaking Meow is quite simple; All one has to do is substitute "meow" for any given word or words in a sentence. For instance: "What are you meowing?" translates into the common English phrase "What are you doing?"                  

    Because implementing the word meow can be ambiguous at times, there is an alternative solution to remedy what could potentially be an extremely confusing conversation. Instead of replacing meow with a single syllable word, the speaker can incorporate it into a two or three syllable word (i.e.: bycimeow=bicycle). Utilizing two and three syllable words helps to elucidate the meaning of what one is trying to convey.

     Serving as one of my most insightful teachers, this unique tongue has molded me into a strong and confident young woman. Through other's mockery, it instilled in me a sense of humor; The sheer ridiculousness of the comical idiom, has taught me how to laugh at myself. Instead of finding their jests offensive, I find them funny. This unique tongue, that started off as a joke, has strengthened my individuality and aided me on the road to personal discovery. Meow is more than just some idiotic slang created by teenagers-- it's a way of life."


I wrote this when I was 17 years old, and submitted it to three UC schools and three private universities with the hopes of receiving letters of admission. Surprisingly, with this essay, I got into everywhere I applied except for UCSB.

I provided my college admissions essay to provide you with a little more clarity and insight pertaining to my cat fascination and the language behind it.

You're probably wondering wtf CMH means. In Meow, to be called a CMH is an extremely high and prestigious honor. Only a privileged few have experienced this distinguished title...I'm not sure if I'm ready to reveal what it means quite yet, since it is so extremely precious and sacred to me.

Till then, I'll leave you with this fun fact: